04-22-2023, 01:18 PM
Chapter 132
Only child syndrome? Not that I can think of? Is it some kind of a disease children can get from a dog like being allergic or something?
Well no Chris, maybe not a real disease, but something being an only child usually contracts. I have older brothers and younger sisters. You have met most of them already. In a bigger family you get used to being ganged up and picked on, made fun of and too many times even ignored.
Basically you get hardened up and not to take everything being said so serious or literally. My oldest brother was nothing but a jerk to me all the way up to when he left for college. I honestly thought he just did not like me or even hated my guts. Nothing I did would change that.
He shot me down on everything I made or even worked on. He made me feel inferior to him regardless the reason. He was good at starting projects. But always lost interest after tearing things apart.
Sometimes I lucked out and traded chores for a few of them. I even bought a couple of his failed projects for next to nothing. I kept thinking about how cool they would have been if he ever finished one. But nothing I fixed or built was good enough in his eyes to give me a thumbs up or offer any advice.
Over time I just ignored anything he said bad about whatever it was. It took me some growing up to realize the problem was his, not mine. He was using me to vent his failures on. Nothing has changed about that except he is away at college and not shooting me down or any of my projects now.
Next time he is out for break or end of semester, I figure things will go back to the same way. Except this time I wont let him get to me. Now what I was trying to tell you is being an only child you dont get to experience different types of interaction with people close to you.
It is really easy to mistake some sarcasm or joking around as someone being serious. Especially if something you can directly relate to. You might get offended because I say something that is not intended to be an insult or putting you down. Especially if taken literally. After a while I hope you can figure out when I am being serious about something worth being serious about.
Most of the time I am joking about things, not to be taken seriously at all. So please dont let yourself get offended if not realizing exactly what I say. You will know for sure the few times I am being serious. Rest of the time it is in humor, not insults or putting you down.
Remember when I got serious about you watching me welding? You kept removing the welding goggles asking questions and not covering your eyes before I struck an arc. I was not mad at you. I did not want you to burn your eyes.
I did not think you realized how easy that would happen. If you took it the worng way and go upset, I am sorry for that. But I am not sorry for making my point on how dangerous that was. But that is the one time I was being serious.
Yea I remember that very well. I thought you were getting really mad at me. But not sure what it was I did wrong. At first it did hurt my feelings. I tried to hold back and figure it all out. Then you said how easy it could be to burn my eyes. You experienced it and did not want me to go thru that pain. Then I sort of understood. Well, except not knowing why you got mad.
I am figuring out about this only child thing you were explaining. My mom gives me a lot of attention when she is home. Sometimes she gets tired of me. Or now from what you have been explaining, maybe not so much like I first thought.
When home by myself I dont have anyone to talk to. So when someone is there I can go overboard. But not realizing like my mom might be tired and just wants to sit back and relax after working all day. She might need some time to herself before I start taking up her spare time.
But what you are telling me, in a large family everyone needs some space and not always wanting attention focused on themselves. So maybe I should think of others first before expecting them to give me all of their time just because I want it.
Well Chris that is a lot more in depth than where I was going. My attempt to explain something was just that when around people all the time, it is easy to take out your stress on someone else. Just think before dumping on someone or getting dumped on.
My oldest brother gave me no mercy and I am now very defensive most of the time. I learned to use wise cracks and personal insults since I was not old enough or strong enough to stand up to my older brothers.
After a while it is easy to be sarcastic about almost everything without even trying. It also helped me from getting so upset. Instead I channeled it into anger. But that was not smart either. It usually made things worse.
I really like having you over here. Even if you do ask way too many questions non stop all the time. You see how that sounded sort of sarcastic? But I really dont mind all of the questions. Someone had to put up with me a few years back or I would not know how to work on anything. You dont learn if you dont ask. Even if it is distracting and can be annoying to some people.
Those same people had to learn from someone else too. But may not think of it in that way. If you are interrupting me too much when I am working on something, step back and think about it for a moment. Wait a few minutes until I am finished with whatever it is I am doing.
When I am in the middle of something that has all of my focus, it is very distracting and sometimes causes me or someone to screw things up. What if that was your engine I just messed up because you were too impatient not wanting to wait until I was finished?
Now here is the 10,0000 dollar question. Lets say you were used to interrupting someone to answer a question or just wanting their attention. That someone was doing something for you and it was ruined because of being interrupted. Are you ready for the question?
Would you be mad?
Do you get mad at that person because they ruined something of yours?
Do you think that person should have stopped working and given that immediate attention to you then nothing would have been ruined?
Is it their fault it got ruined?
So Chris, what about it?
Wow Terry, now you are getting way to deep for me. I dont exactly understand you point to all of this.
Chris being an only child, the focus is always on you. You are probably used to getting your way most of the time. There can be plenty of reasons for this too. Not just selfish ones. But that means you get most if not of the attention you want when you want it.
But if you got mad about this, which reason would make the most sense to you?
OK, I will try to understand what you are doing a poor job attempting to explain. I guess if the person would have stopped for a moment then answering my question, nothing would have been ruined. My stuff would be good and I got answered. Is that what I am supposed to figure out?
But that might be how you think I would see it. From what you told me about having to share time with other people around, then I should have waited a few minutes until their work was finished, then ask my questions. So not expecting everyone else to jump just for me all the time. Especially if that person if working on something of mine.
Being an only child, you assume I would expect to get the focus on me instead of waiting until the focus was off whatever of mine was ruined due to my interruption. Is that what I am supposed to figure out after working around say, like with you and Steve for a while?
You said I would get strangled if I kept up the metaphor jumbo. So I assume you were getting tired of that and wanted to stay focused on the karts. I took that as you getting irritated at me when really you were just more or less joking around. Even tho it was a very poor one.
Chris, all this week every bit of my free time has only been pushing toward having all three karts finished by this weekend. That means I have to stay focused on just the karts or it does not happen.
You see, I figured all of this out just now by remembering the significance of knowing my history. I dont want to be doomed at repeating failed projects because of getting sidetracked or loosing interest over and over again like my brother. I gave Chris a big grin because of what he had said about that.
So for the last thirty minutes we have been discussing everything else but the unfinished karts sitting here in pieces. If we put that much effort in to the karts, they could be a lot closer to being done by now. Unless you are just not that interested in ever racing again.
So do you want to talk about metaphors, analogies and puppies or run up to the store and grab some sodas and candy bars? My brain is not used to this kind of mental challenge. I really needs a break.
Terry, I am super interested in racing again. More than anything else. Just soon as it can happen. But I dont know how to do any of the work yet. I am relying on you to help me with everything. But if you need a break, we can do that too. It is my treat this time. Whatever you want. But I still dont understand what the point is you are trying to get across to me?
Chris you have a thick head and thin skin. Does that make you mad or upset because of what I just said?
Well if I knew you were being serious, it might come off offensive. But I dont think you are trying to upset me.
How about you try to ignore anything me and Steve throw at you. Any insults, rude comments, or making fun at the way you do something. It is all nothing but joking around. Just to take away some of the stress for the next couple of days.
If you can put up with us, after a while you will be able to cut up and throw out insults right back without offending anyone. But you will have to learn the unwritten rules that dont exist before getting too carried away with the insults.
One thing for example is like you cant make fun of Steves mom because she wears army boots to church. That is totally off limits. In fact, you cant even mention anything about her wearing army boots anywhere.
Now if there is something you feel is off limits about yourself, speak now or forever get offended by us. Once you make it known, then we will have some ammunition to use against you when you actually get one of us mad.
Terry, that doesnt even make sense. Does his mother really wear army boots?
Chris that is one of the unwritten rules, you can never talk about. And its not supposed to make sense. Besides I was done with the lecture a long time ago. It wasnt even supposed to be a lecture. But you were acting too serious, so I kept going with it.
Since then I have just been winging it making stuff up. Then pulling your strings to see what gets under that thin skin of yours. And no she does not wear army boots. It is just a generic insult. Like telling a guy he plays baseball like a girl.
Terry, how about we start working on the karts when back from the store. I am so confused right now. I dont have any idea what this is all about either. But some of it really does make some sense right up until it doesnt make any sense at all.
You have made me think about certain things. I do realize the world does not revolve around just me. But I already figured that out a long time ago. I know me asking too many questions annoys most people, but you usually take the time to explain things. I really appreciate that.
When I am helping out at Pauls shop, there are times I interrupt him without thinking. If he is busy, like on the phone or helping a customer, he gives me this evil eye look and shakes his head. So I have been getting better with that.
I have noticed you can keep working on something and still try to answer my questions most of the time. But I also figured out when you are really involved with something important, I should hold off until later.
If I get too annoying just tell me. I now understand some of the stuff better. But not sure if it was something you were really trying to get thru my thick head. While saying this he was knocking on his skull with his fist.
Right as Chris finished speaking he let out a big ear to ear grin, almost devious looking. Then his signiture double chuckle I have gotten used to hearing from him.
Hey Terry, what does all this have to do with a puppy? After he asked me this, I reached out my hands and started wringing his skinny neck in a mock choke hold. He responded by gagging and gasping for air sounds. But trying unsuccessfully not to laugh too much.
At the 7-11 I did my usual Peanut M&M. Along with the cold Mountain Dew. Walking over to the magazine rack, is when I stopped rambling on and stared at what was there.
HOLY COW, CHRIS, lookie here! Sitting on the rack was a paperback book that got my full attention. I guess you would call it that. Like a quarterly or yearly publication that is binded and thicker than a magazine. But not exactly like the usual but smaller sized paper back book.
An issue of KARTING IDEAS. I have last years KARTING HANDBOOK. Also an issue of Lets go KARTING from two years ago. I picked these up from the second hand book store over the last year looking at things I didnt need. But never seen this issue or others new like this on the shelf before.
I started thumbing thru the book until the store clerk cleared his throat. I knew what that meant. Look at it or buy it, not play with it. Geez, this sucks. The price is 75 cents. I cant throw that much money away for this. Besides I barely have that much in my pocket right now.
Cool book, Terry. You gonna buy it? I have a few magazines, but not one like this. If you are not going to, I will get it for myself.
No Chris, I can swing it right now. But looks like some good articles from the index page.
Well go ahead and grab it for me and lets get some extra drinks and stuff. I want to get my kart put together this weekend. Well if that is possible. So lets hurry up and get out of here. I have already wasted too much of your time this afternoon.
Chris asked what Steve likes to drink then went over to the cooler and grabbed another Mountain Dew, two Dr Peppers and a Coke. He told me to pitch the small bag of M&M's and get the really big one. He likes them when they are cold so we can share and get a lot more this way.
Walking down the alley on the way back home, Chris told me he has bought a couple of these type books. Well whatever you would call them. Something between a magazine and a book. After reading the articles it usually leaves him with more questions than answers.
You know what Terry? When I first read my books, nothing really clicked. Especially articles about modifying the engines. The more I read, the more confused I got. It wasnt until after I was over here last time when some things finally started making sense.
I cant wait to read thru the articles again after you show me how to put my engine back together. I hope to understand what they are talking about better. I still dont have a clue exactly how an engine even works.
I have read a lot of how-to books on things in the library, but just start scratching my thick head even more. I hope after you explain a few things to me then stuff will finally make some sense.
If you would like to read this book first, I will leave it with you for now. You are more than welcome to keep it for a while. Then you can tell me what I cant figure out for myself later on when I read it.
Only child syndrome? Not that I can think of? Is it some kind of a disease children can get from a dog like being allergic or something?
Well no Chris, maybe not a real disease, but something being an only child usually contracts. I have older brothers and younger sisters. You have met most of them already. In a bigger family you get used to being ganged up and picked on, made fun of and too many times even ignored.
Basically you get hardened up and not to take everything being said so serious or literally. My oldest brother was nothing but a jerk to me all the way up to when he left for college. I honestly thought he just did not like me or even hated my guts. Nothing I did would change that.
He shot me down on everything I made or even worked on. He made me feel inferior to him regardless the reason. He was good at starting projects. But always lost interest after tearing things apart.
Sometimes I lucked out and traded chores for a few of them. I even bought a couple of his failed projects for next to nothing. I kept thinking about how cool they would have been if he ever finished one. But nothing I fixed or built was good enough in his eyes to give me a thumbs up or offer any advice.
Over time I just ignored anything he said bad about whatever it was. It took me some growing up to realize the problem was his, not mine. He was using me to vent his failures on. Nothing has changed about that except he is away at college and not shooting me down or any of my projects now.
Next time he is out for break or end of semester, I figure things will go back to the same way. Except this time I wont let him get to me. Now what I was trying to tell you is being an only child you dont get to experience different types of interaction with people close to you.
It is really easy to mistake some sarcasm or joking around as someone being serious. Especially if something you can directly relate to. You might get offended because I say something that is not intended to be an insult or putting you down. Especially if taken literally. After a while I hope you can figure out when I am being serious about something worth being serious about.
Most of the time I am joking about things, not to be taken seriously at all. So please dont let yourself get offended if not realizing exactly what I say. You will know for sure the few times I am being serious. Rest of the time it is in humor, not insults or putting you down.
Remember when I got serious about you watching me welding? You kept removing the welding goggles asking questions and not covering your eyes before I struck an arc. I was not mad at you. I did not want you to burn your eyes.
I did not think you realized how easy that would happen. If you took it the worng way and go upset, I am sorry for that. But I am not sorry for making my point on how dangerous that was. But that is the one time I was being serious.
Yea I remember that very well. I thought you were getting really mad at me. But not sure what it was I did wrong. At first it did hurt my feelings. I tried to hold back and figure it all out. Then you said how easy it could be to burn my eyes. You experienced it and did not want me to go thru that pain. Then I sort of understood. Well, except not knowing why you got mad.
I am figuring out about this only child thing you were explaining. My mom gives me a lot of attention when she is home. Sometimes she gets tired of me. Or now from what you have been explaining, maybe not so much like I first thought.
When home by myself I dont have anyone to talk to. So when someone is there I can go overboard. But not realizing like my mom might be tired and just wants to sit back and relax after working all day. She might need some time to herself before I start taking up her spare time.
But what you are telling me, in a large family everyone needs some space and not always wanting attention focused on themselves. So maybe I should think of others first before expecting them to give me all of their time just because I want it.
Well Chris that is a lot more in depth than where I was going. My attempt to explain something was just that when around people all the time, it is easy to take out your stress on someone else. Just think before dumping on someone or getting dumped on.
My oldest brother gave me no mercy and I am now very defensive most of the time. I learned to use wise cracks and personal insults since I was not old enough or strong enough to stand up to my older brothers.
After a while it is easy to be sarcastic about almost everything without even trying. It also helped me from getting so upset. Instead I channeled it into anger. But that was not smart either. It usually made things worse.
I really like having you over here. Even if you do ask way too many questions non stop all the time. You see how that sounded sort of sarcastic? But I really dont mind all of the questions. Someone had to put up with me a few years back or I would not know how to work on anything. You dont learn if you dont ask. Even if it is distracting and can be annoying to some people.
Those same people had to learn from someone else too. But may not think of it in that way. If you are interrupting me too much when I am working on something, step back and think about it for a moment. Wait a few minutes until I am finished with whatever it is I am doing.
When I am in the middle of something that has all of my focus, it is very distracting and sometimes causes me or someone to screw things up. What if that was your engine I just messed up because you were too impatient not wanting to wait until I was finished?
Now here is the 10,0000 dollar question. Lets say you were used to interrupting someone to answer a question or just wanting their attention. That someone was doing something for you and it was ruined because of being interrupted. Are you ready for the question?
Would you be mad?
Do you get mad at that person because they ruined something of yours?
Do you think that person should have stopped working and given that immediate attention to you then nothing would have been ruined?
Is it their fault it got ruined?
So Chris, what about it?
Wow Terry, now you are getting way to deep for me. I dont exactly understand you point to all of this.
Chris being an only child, the focus is always on you. You are probably used to getting your way most of the time. There can be plenty of reasons for this too. Not just selfish ones. But that means you get most if not of the attention you want when you want it.
But if you got mad about this, which reason would make the most sense to you?
OK, I will try to understand what you are doing a poor job attempting to explain. I guess if the person would have stopped for a moment then answering my question, nothing would have been ruined. My stuff would be good and I got answered. Is that what I am supposed to figure out?
But that might be how you think I would see it. From what you told me about having to share time with other people around, then I should have waited a few minutes until their work was finished, then ask my questions. So not expecting everyone else to jump just for me all the time. Especially if that person if working on something of mine.
Being an only child, you assume I would expect to get the focus on me instead of waiting until the focus was off whatever of mine was ruined due to my interruption. Is that what I am supposed to figure out after working around say, like with you and Steve for a while?
You said I would get strangled if I kept up the metaphor jumbo. So I assume you were getting tired of that and wanted to stay focused on the karts. I took that as you getting irritated at me when really you were just more or less joking around. Even tho it was a very poor one.
Chris, all this week every bit of my free time has only been pushing toward having all three karts finished by this weekend. That means I have to stay focused on just the karts or it does not happen.
You see, I figured all of this out just now by remembering the significance of knowing my history. I dont want to be doomed at repeating failed projects because of getting sidetracked or loosing interest over and over again like my brother. I gave Chris a big grin because of what he had said about that.
So for the last thirty minutes we have been discussing everything else but the unfinished karts sitting here in pieces. If we put that much effort in to the karts, they could be a lot closer to being done by now. Unless you are just not that interested in ever racing again.
So do you want to talk about metaphors, analogies and puppies or run up to the store and grab some sodas and candy bars? My brain is not used to this kind of mental challenge. I really needs a break.
Terry, I am super interested in racing again. More than anything else. Just soon as it can happen. But I dont know how to do any of the work yet. I am relying on you to help me with everything. But if you need a break, we can do that too. It is my treat this time. Whatever you want. But I still dont understand what the point is you are trying to get across to me?
Chris you have a thick head and thin skin. Does that make you mad or upset because of what I just said?
Well if I knew you were being serious, it might come off offensive. But I dont think you are trying to upset me.
How about you try to ignore anything me and Steve throw at you. Any insults, rude comments, or making fun at the way you do something. It is all nothing but joking around. Just to take away some of the stress for the next couple of days.
If you can put up with us, after a while you will be able to cut up and throw out insults right back without offending anyone. But you will have to learn the unwritten rules that dont exist before getting too carried away with the insults.
One thing for example is like you cant make fun of Steves mom because she wears army boots to church. That is totally off limits. In fact, you cant even mention anything about her wearing army boots anywhere.
Now if there is something you feel is off limits about yourself, speak now or forever get offended by us. Once you make it known, then we will have some ammunition to use against you when you actually get one of us mad.
Terry, that doesnt even make sense. Does his mother really wear army boots?
Chris that is one of the unwritten rules, you can never talk about. And its not supposed to make sense. Besides I was done with the lecture a long time ago. It wasnt even supposed to be a lecture. But you were acting too serious, so I kept going with it.
Since then I have just been winging it making stuff up. Then pulling your strings to see what gets under that thin skin of yours. And no she does not wear army boots. It is just a generic insult. Like telling a guy he plays baseball like a girl.
Terry, how about we start working on the karts when back from the store. I am so confused right now. I dont have any idea what this is all about either. But some of it really does make some sense right up until it doesnt make any sense at all.
You have made me think about certain things. I do realize the world does not revolve around just me. But I already figured that out a long time ago. I know me asking too many questions annoys most people, but you usually take the time to explain things. I really appreciate that.
When I am helping out at Pauls shop, there are times I interrupt him without thinking. If he is busy, like on the phone or helping a customer, he gives me this evil eye look and shakes his head. So I have been getting better with that.
I have noticed you can keep working on something and still try to answer my questions most of the time. But I also figured out when you are really involved with something important, I should hold off until later.
If I get too annoying just tell me. I now understand some of the stuff better. But not sure if it was something you were really trying to get thru my thick head. While saying this he was knocking on his skull with his fist.
Right as Chris finished speaking he let out a big ear to ear grin, almost devious looking. Then his signiture double chuckle I have gotten used to hearing from him.
Hey Terry, what does all this have to do with a puppy? After he asked me this, I reached out my hands and started wringing his skinny neck in a mock choke hold. He responded by gagging and gasping for air sounds. But trying unsuccessfully not to laugh too much.
At the 7-11 I did my usual Peanut M&M. Along with the cold Mountain Dew. Walking over to the magazine rack, is when I stopped rambling on and stared at what was there.
HOLY COW, CHRIS, lookie here! Sitting on the rack was a paperback book that got my full attention. I guess you would call it that. Like a quarterly or yearly publication that is binded and thicker than a magazine. But not exactly like the usual but smaller sized paper back book.
An issue of KARTING IDEAS. I have last years KARTING HANDBOOK. Also an issue of Lets go KARTING from two years ago. I picked these up from the second hand book store over the last year looking at things I didnt need. But never seen this issue or others new like this on the shelf before.
I started thumbing thru the book until the store clerk cleared his throat. I knew what that meant. Look at it or buy it, not play with it. Geez, this sucks. The price is 75 cents. I cant throw that much money away for this. Besides I barely have that much in my pocket right now.
Cool book, Terry. You gonna buy it? I have a few magazines, but not one like this. If you are not going to, I will get it for myself.
No Chris, I can swing it right now. But looks like some good articles from the index page.
Well go ahead and grab it for me and lets get some extra drinks and stuff. I want to get my kart put together this weekend. Well if that is possible. So lets hurry up and get out of here. I have already wasted too much of your time this afternoon.
Chris asked what Steve likes to drink then went over to the cooler and grabbed another Mountain Dew, two Dr Peppers and a Coke. He told me to pitch the small bag of M&M's and get the really big one. He likes them when they are cold so we can share and get a lot more this way.
Walking down the alley on the way back home, Chris told me he has bought a couple of these type books. Well whatever you would call them. Something between a magazine and a book. After reading the articles it usually leaves him with more questions than answers.
You know what Terry? When I first read my books, nothing really clicked. Especially articles about modifying the engines. The more I read, the more confused I got. It wasnt until after I was over here last time when some things finally started making sense.
I cant wait to read thru the articles again after you show me how to put my engine back together. I hope to understand what they are talking about better. I still dont have a clue exactly how an engine even works.
I have read a lot of how-to books on things in the library, but just start scratching my thick head even more. I hope after you explain a few things to me then stuff will finally make some sense.
If you would like to read this book first, I will leave it with you for now. You are more than welcome to keep it for a while. Then you can tell me what I cant figure out for myself later on when I read it.